Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Why Do I Always Have To Wait?

My relationship...
I see Stephen every Friday from 11:30am after school until sometime Saturday afternoon,sometimes if I'm lucky I get him until Sunday, but then he has to leave right when he gets up. I absolutely hate it. If I'm extra lucky he comes over some days for lunch but that's like a 45 minute visit for lunch or sex.

He called after school and automatically assumed I was mad by the tone of my voice and said I was giving him attitude. I eventually freaked out on him for forgetting to say Happy Anniversary and he told me he was going to on the last phone call but I let him go too fast and never called him back. So was it that hard in the 24 hours of that day to just text me and say it, or to call even though I didn't want to talk and be like "oh btw happy anniversary baby". Yes I get it you're busy with school stuff and you're family but it's not fucking hard to say it and get back to your life.Now you've hurt your girls feelings! Isn't that great!

Once he's done with school in June he plans to move to Nova Scotia and go to Dalhousie University, which is cool, he's doing something with his life. It's always been a plan that I go with him and we live happily ever after... We get a cute apartment live close to the university I get a cozy day job I love, come home make him dinner, ask how his day was, and then go about our day until bedtime and then YAY CUDDLE TIME!!! I love having him here at bedtime because I hate hate hate sleeping alone, and I can actually sleep when he's here.
In our past few talks about the move though he's told me his parents are making him live on campus for his first year! Therefore I get to live alone for another year! I've explained to him so many times that I would let him stay with me and he wouldn't have to pay, I'd work extra hard to make more money for us, but no his parents will only pay for rez, no staying with sara, fuck sara and her happiness.
Does this mean once again I only get him once a week?
What does it mean? I'm moving all the way to the East Coast to live by myself and see him when, when he's not busy?
What's the point in me going?
If I don't go with him we're over though, and with all the work I'm trying to do to keep us together that's just a dumb idea.
I don't want to go and live alone for the first year, I'd know nobody and be in a new province and that's going to be so scary.
He's got about 6 years of school left I think, I know I'm being a cry baby bitching, but I'm just so sick of waiting.

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